#jack has got his priorities straight

[muzzlemouths]

WHAT

Maybe today.

For @muzzlemouths dead mall dare au.

[drysdalesworld]

ducks, ducks, ducks

jamie drysdale x fem!hughes!reader

social media au set before injury & trade! (still salty about it)

y/n.hughes just posted!

liked by adamfantilli, uoregon, yourbestie, and more

y/n.hughes: ducks, ducks, ducks 🦆

tagged: yourbestie, anaheimducks, uoregon

( loading comments! )

yourbestie: ducks!!

userone: the best duck there is

usertwo: fr!

userthree: who? jamie or y/n?

userone: y/n 100% userthree

trevorzegras: i’m still petty over the fact that you didn’t hug me first

y/n.hughes: i would’ve if you didn’t take forever to leave the locker room

jamie.drysdale: you were too slow z

trevorzegras: ☹️

userfour: trev being petty over the fact that he wasn’t one of the first people to hug y/n after the game has me ROLLING 😭

userfive: fr!! i love how jokingly possessive he is over the hughes siblings. it’s too funny

usersix: esp over jack and y/n. it’s hilarious 😂

yourroommate: how much sleep did you get this weekend?

y/n.hughes: none ☺️

yourroommate: babes

yourbestie: she literally brought her suitcase to the party so she could immediately go straight to the airport afterwards

userseven: stop!! that’s so cute!!

y/n.hughes: worth it tho

jamie.drysdale: loved having you at my game baby 🤍

jackhughes: is that why you ignored my facetime earlier 🥲

y/n.hughes: yes. i had other priorities

jackhughes: wow. so your older brother isn’t a priority? i see how it is 😒

y/n.hughes: dramatic ass

jackhughes: i’m telling mom!

usereight: y/n knows where her priorities lie lol

_quinnhughes: hope you had fun sis!

y/n.hughes: i did! thank you quinny <33

lhughes_06: take notes jackhughes

jackhughes: i’m being attacked at all sides aren’t i

colecaufield: when are you going to visit 😖

y/n.hughes: bake me your moms homemade cookies and then we’ll talk

colecaufield: done ✅

anaheimducks: the best duck we know!

markestapa: visit us next!!

tyler_duke5: on my knees begging

alexturcotte: hope oregon’s treating you well girl hughes!!

y/n.hughes just posted!

liked by trevorzegras, rutgermcgroarty, and more

y/n.hughes: why do i have to be such a studious gf that’s pursuing her college degree and not a stay at home gf 😫

tagged: jamie.drysdale

( loading comments ! )

trevorzegras: just drop out. problem solved

userone: that’s not

jackhughes: are you encouraging my sister to drop out of college z 🤨

trevorzegras: just saying j. it’s an easy fix

lhughes_06: that’s what you get for double majoring in english and communications with a minor in political science girlie

usertwo: did luke just refer to his sister as girlie?

userthree: yes, yes he did

y/n.hughes: at least i’ll have a degree in my name & not just on the back of a jersey

trevorzegras: DAYUMM BABY HUGHES YOU JUST GOT BURNED

y/n.hughes: same goes for you trev

userfour: oop

jamie.drysdale: because you’re a smart and hardworking girl baby ☺️

y/n.hughes: awww jimmy!! i love you so much ❤️❤️

userfive: are we just going to brush over the fact that y/n is a double major with a minor?? babes is getting NO sleep

y/n.hughes: ZERO

y/n.hughes: sleep is for the weak!

usersix: praying for your health & sanity bbg

userfive: get some sleep girl!! it’s important for your health!

yourbestie: get that degree babes!! be the most studious wag ever!!

yourroommate: FRFR

anaheimducks: getting the jack ready rn

luca.fantilli: the smartest hughes

lhughes_06: offense taken

y/n.hughes: thank you luca <3 speaking the truth fr

rutgermcgroarty: speaking of the smart hughes, can you help me with my essay y/n.hughes 😖

y/n.hughes: ofc rut! i’ll call you at 9

rutgermcgroarty: bless thank you 🙏

elhughes: so proud of you baby 💚💚

y/n.hughes: thank you mama!! i love you so much 🤍

jackhughes: the smartest sister i have

_quinnhughes: she’s the only sister you have idiot

jackhughes: okay and ???

userseven: the pic of jamie tying her shoe 😭😭

masonmctavish23: the most studious person i know!

trevorzegras: idk why but i feel offended

y/n.hughes: babes, we all know you practically have an iq of a grape

jackhughes: she isn’t wrong z 😂

y/n.hughes just posted to their story!

caption: last date night with lover boy until thanksgiving break jamie.drysdale :(

trevorzegras replied!

finally! i no longer have to deal with you and jimbo’s lovey dovey grossness 🤢

jk! love you 🫶🏼 you make jimmy more tolerable

jamie.drysdale replied!

i’m going to miss you baby! :( study hard & take care of yourself lovey 🤍

lhughes_06 replied!

since when were you NOT coming home for turkey break??! 🤨

[honeypiehotchner]

The Gambit (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- part one

I'm backkk 👀 Reminder that y'all do NOT like each other (for now 🤭)

I did a lot of math to make sure I had my timeline in order but I won't bore y'all with all the numbers. Some basics, tho: we're somewhere in s5/6, Foyet doesn't exist here but Haley and Hotch are divorced and Jack lives with Haley, Reader is in her mid 30s and Hotch is in his mid 40s. That's all for now, happy reading! xxx

Chapter warnings: these two are at each other's throats! and a new case begins ofc

Your day started out perfectly.

You sorted more of your belongings into boxes for the movers. Everything will be shipped ahead so it arrives shortly after you do at your apartment in Virginia. You’re running ahead of schedule, so you even have time to stop for a good breakfast before heading into the office.

The day felt…too good to be true. And you quickly find out why. 

“The BAU?”

Your superior, Agent Reynolds, sits across from you and raises an eyebrow, assuming incorrectly that you haven’t heard of the branch. “The Behavioral Analy—”

“Yes, I know what the BAU is,” you cut him off, something he’s used to, waving your hand sharply. “Why the BAU?”

“You were requested,” he replies simply with a slight shrug.

“By who?”

“Agent Hotchner, as I’m told.”

That is the last name you ever expected him to say. 

“Hotch?” you echo incredulously. “You’re kidding.”

Reynolds sighs. “I’m really not.” You know deep down Reynolds will miss you, but he’ll also thank god every day that he doesn’t have to put up with your attitude anymore. 

“Huh.” You could laugh. You almost do. “Interesting.”

Your now ex-boss gives you a look, and a sigh. “What now?”

“Oh, nothing,” you shake your head. “Agent Hotchner and I have met before, that’s all.”

+++

Ten and a half years prior to the present day, you worked on a case with Aaron Hotchner. 

Key word: case. One singular case.

You were joined by agents Gideon, Morgan, and, of course, Hotchner. You were the only woman with them at the time, and that already threatened to drive you up a wall. To make matters worse, you and Hotch could not get along to save anyone’s lives. 

The two of you butted heads for two weeks straight, but even that is sugar coating it. He raised his voice at you and you raised your voice right back. Of course, only in private. In the field, you were as professional as can be. But in the tiny conference room that you had to set up for them coming in unannounced? All bets were off.

You’ve never been a particularly angry person, but something about Hotch brought all your anger to the surface.

He was the most arrogant man you had ever come across. He explained things to you that you already knew, and even when you told him you were aware of the topic, he’d continue explaining like he hadn’t heard you, just out of spite.

He underestimated you in ways that had your blood boiling. He wouldn’t send you to interview anyone, despite that being your area of expertise. He had you doing busy work, like a goddamn intern. 

You were your office’s own little BAU. You had read Gideon’s papers, been to profiling lectures. You became a profiler because you knew your city needed one, and by your fifth year in the office, you were one. You knew what you were doing, and Hotch treated you like a newbie. 

He always walked around in a damn suit and tie. Does he not own a t-shirt? Does he know what that is? Would it kill him to breathe once in a while?

Why does he have to look like he constantly has a stick up his ass?

Of course, you aren’t totally innocent. You found his buttons and pushed them since day one. He hated being talked over or shouted at, so those became your favorite things. Especially after he began doing them to you.

Don’t disobey direct orders, he said. You did. And you got the results needed, so he had no choice but to move on.

Don’t come into the interrogation room unless asked for, he said. You did anyway. The unsub needed to feel important, a high priority, and he wasn’t. So, you walked in and told Hotch that the Attorney General of the United States was on the phone. It worked. While Hotch “spoke with the Attorney General,” you got a confession. Hotch had to thank you through gritted teeth.

When the case was solved and the BAU left town, you popped a bottle of fucking champagne. Good riddance you screamed and drank straight from the foaming top.

+++

You mutter under your breath the entire drive to the BAU. Your boxes arrived this morning, but you haven’t had a chance to unpack them, so your apartment is currently a shitshow. 

And now you’re driving to deal with another shitshow. 

You haven’t received any emails or texts from Hotch, which is odd, but you’re sure as hell not questioning it. The less you have to deal with him, the better. He probably shares the same sentiment, which is why he hasn’t contacted you.

From far away, Quantico looks more like a prison than it does a headquarters. You hope it doesn’t feel the same way it looks.

The BAU office is just a short elevator ride up from the parking garage, and you dread every second of it. When the doors open on the BAU floor, you want to scream.

But you’re a professional, not a toddler, so you walk your ass through the glass doors and into the bullpen, your head held high like an adult.

“No. Fucking. Way.”

“Hi Morgan,” you mirror his grin, accepting his hug. “Miss me?”

He’s in the same black t-shirt and black jeans he always wears, his haircut just the same but shorter. And he finally got rid of the “shaving my face every morning” routine. Stubble looks much better on him.

“For ten years,” Morgan reminds you. “What brings you here?”

You shrug cheekily, feigning innocence. “I heard there was an opening.”

His grin, somehow, grows wider and brighter. “Come here!” He tackles you in another hug, this time lifting you up and spinning you. “God is on my side to-day. Where’s Reid?”

“Putting a disastrous amount of sugar in his coffee,” a blonde woman says as she passes, then stops. “Oh, hi. I’m JJ, you must be Agent L/N. I heard you were coming in today.”

You escape from Morgan’s grip to shake JJ’s hand. “That’s me. JJ, you said?”

She nods, shifting her feet to a more comfortable position in her heels. “I’m the BAU liaison, so you’ll see a lot of me. And very little of me. It’s complicated.”

“I hear that,” you chuckle, just glad to see another woman has joined the team.

And to your surprise, another joins the circle, this one with black hair parted down the middle. “Emily Prentiss,” she says, sticking out her hand. “Are we finally getting another woman around here?”

You nod, glad to hear she agrees with your unspoken comment. “Looks like it.”

“Did someone call my name?”

You turn and see the infamous Dr. Reid stirring a mug of sugar with a splash of coffee. He’s wearing a cardigan, per usual, and what looks like the same pair converse from when you first met him five years ago at a lecture the BAU put on. He was brand new back then. His eyebrows furrow when he sees you, and then they go wide.

“Y/N? Hi!” he says excitedly, nearly spilling his drink. “It’s been so long! Wha— What are you doing here?”

You give JJ and Emily a look that only you three truly understand. “Why do none of the men assume I’ll be joining the team?”

Emily laughs. “Believe me, I wish I knew.”

“Wait, seriously?” Reid blurts. “Are you really joining us?”

“Sure am,” you grin. “And once I get out of this meeting with Hotch, you’re telling me when the hell you joined a boyband.”

“Oh, ouch,” Morgan taps Reid’s arm lightly with a grin.

“Uh, you too, Derek,” you punch him, letting him know he isn’t off the hook either. “What’s up with the shirt? Do you not own another color?”

“Damn, momma,” Morgan groans. “You haven’t changed.”

“Neither have you,” you pat his cheek.

“I like you already,” Emily grins.

“Agent L/N,” an unmistakable voice comes from the top of the stairs, effectively ruining the moment. 

He definitely hasn’t changed, you think to yourself as you slowly turn around. 

“Agent Hotchner,” you mimic his tone. “Nice to see you again.”

He grips the railing a little too tightly. And he’s still wearing a damn suit, with a damn tie knotted so tight you wonder if it’s choking him. If it’s not, you want it to be. Maybe he’ll shut up then. 

“I believe our meeting was scheduled for 9am,” he says, earning a sideways glance from the other man standing on the balcony. 

“It still is,” you reply, looking beside his head at the clock on the wall and shit. “I’m late. That’s my fault, sir. I apologize.”

“Yes, it is,” he says. “We need to make this short. Hurry up.” 

He turns and disappears into his office like some imitation of Dracula. You give Derek a helpless look.

“Welcome back,” Reid says, grimacing.

“Thanks, bud,” you reply, knowing he means well. “If any of you hear any screaming, pay no mind, that’s just how we greet each oth—”

“Agent L/N!” Hotch shouts from his doorway.

“Coming!” you shout back, just as loud and just as annoyed. “For fuck’s sake,” you mutter to yourself.

You hop up the stairs two at a time, reaching Hotch’s office in seconds. 

The man that was beside Hotch offers you a smile. “I’m Agent Rossi,” he extends his hand. 

“Agent L/N,” you return the friendly expression, shaking his hand, just glad that he at least seems happy to meet you. “I’ll see you soon, I’m sure.”

Rossi nods slowly, mouthing, “Good luck.”

You like him already. You smirk.

Hotch is standing behind his desk when you walk into his office, anger written all over his face. His arms are crossed over his chest, fingers picking at his nails ever so slightly.

“Close the door.”

“Promise not to shoot me?” you joke, but it doesn’t land. You shut the door and take a seat in front of his desk while he remains standing. “Well?”

Finally, he speaks. “What the hell are you doing here?”

You let out a laugh. “Oh, great.” You sit up because this is just stupid. “Are you kidding me? This is the last division I wanted to work in, but I was transferred here. At your behest, might I add—”

“I can assure you, Agent L/N, I did not request that you join my team,” he says as he sits down, rolling toward his desk and placing his arms over the files littered before him.

“Well then Agent Reynolds is a fucking liar, I guess,” you deadpan. “He’s the one who told me I was assigned to the BAU — because of you.”

“Well it wasn’t me.”

“Glad we got that settled,” you shoot back, wanting instead to add, like I fucking care if it was you or not. “Listen, whether either of us likes it or not, I was assigned here, so I’m here. If you want me to leave, take it up with Agent Reynolds or whoever the fuck really requested me. But I can’t do shit about this, and this is now my job, so I’m not leaving just because you want to have some pissing contest.”

He looks like he’s chewing on fire. “Your job security is not my problem—”

“For God’s sake, call your fucking boss, it won’t make you any less of a man to ask a goddamn question about why you have a new agent in your office.”

Hotch glares at you, but does as you say, picking up his desk phone and pressing a few buttons.

You sit back in your chair, waiting in silence. You turn your head to look through the blinds because Hotch didn’t close them all the way, and you nearly start to laugh. Huddled around one desk, Morgan, JJ, Emily, Reid, and another blonde woman dressed in bright colors and shapes are listening intently to Reid who is no doubt lip reading and translating this entire conversation.

Finally, the line connects and Hotch starts speaking. Almost as quick as the phone call begins, it ends.

“Well?” you ask.

“There was some miscommunication,” Hotch admits, though he does not look happy about it. “Welcome to the Behavioral Analysis Unit.”

You smile sarcastically. “Thank you, Agent Hotchner.”

“You’re dismissed,” he says. “We’ll meet in the conference room in five minutes to discuss the rest of today. Don’t be late.”

“Yes, sir,” you mutter as you escape his office, just glad he didn’t torture you with a handshake.

Emerging from Hotch’s office, you stand against the railing and ask the team where the conference room is.

Morgan points to your left. “Why?”

“He told me we’re meeting there to discuss—”

“That’s on hold now,” JJ says, whirling around the BAU with an armful of files. “We’ve got a case. Missing girl, thirteen years old.” She passes out files in the bullpen, handing one to you as she ascends the stairs.

“Shit,” you mutter. “How long has she been missing?”

“Starting without me?” Hotch asks as he walks out of his office. He takes a file from JJ and says a quiet, “Thanks.”

“Yep, we are,” you say right back, scanning your file. You think you hear Rossi let out a chuckle at your response. “Gone since this morning. Are they certain it wasn’t overnight?”

“The mother dropped Lila off at school this morning at seven, and by nine, she was absent,” JJ explains as everyone fills into the conference room. “They paged her at school over the intercom, but she’s not in any of the classrooms.”

“How are we hearing about this so quickly?” Morgan asks. “I mean, I’m glad, but it’s been…just over an hour. We don’t normally have this much time.”

“Because,” JJ pauses, pointing the remote toward the TV. “This is Lila’s father.”

On the screen, the FBI’s Most Wanted are staring back at you. JJ clicks again, and one face comes forward.

“Who?” Emily says.

“Richard Monroe,” Reid says aloud. “He’s been on the run for almost two years. He’s said to have killed a dozen people, all females, but they suspect there might be more. Every time we’ve come close to catching him, he gets away.”

“And now his daughter is missing,” Rossi adds. “I’m guessing this guy is our unsub.”

“I don’t know,” you stare into Richard’s eyes on the screen. “When was he last seen?”

“You can investigate that when we get there,” Hotch says curtly. “They’re waiting for us and we’ll lose time by flying. Wheels up in ten.”

Everyone files out of the room and Hotch stays back, waiting for you to be the last one in the room.

“Agent L/N,” Hotch gets your attention. “Since you’ve never tackled a case like this before, try your best to follow orders, and watch what the team does. Don’t make any rash decisions and don’t go off on your own.”

None of his comments anger you as much as the first one. “You don’t know that I’ve never encountered something like this.”

“Don’t argue with me when we have a missing girl,” Hotch snaps. “Do I make myself clear?”

“Crystal,” you reply, pushing past him.

“I hope you have a go bag,” he calls after you. “There will be no time for shopping when we’re on the ground.”

“Then I’ll just wear your clothes!” you yell back, knowing it’ll get a rise out of him. You hear Morgan snicker down in the bullpen. 

“Agent L/N,” Hotch says, and when you turn around, you see he’s giving you his famous stare.

You sigh. “My bag is in my car. It’ll take me two minutes to grab it. That’s clearly less than ten. Unless you have anything else to say that might delay me further?”

“Go,” he says, waving you away as he heads into his office to grab his bag. “Now.”

+++

While you’re on the jet, you do some research on Richard Monroe. He’s a grade A piece of shit if you’ve ever seen one.

But he’s not the type to go after his daughter.

“Garcia, can you check and see if Richard tried at all to contact Lila on her cell?” you ask.

“I would, sweets, but I can’t find Lila’s phone. Their house phone, however, has no calls.”

“He wouldn’t call the house phone, not with Lila’s mom watching over her like a hawk,” you murmur. 

Hotch lifts his head. “How do you know that?”

“Know what?”

“That her mother would be overbearing.”

“Her father’s a serial killer on the run, Hotch,” you reply. “Any mother would keep tabs on her daughter’s every breath if she had a father like that. It’s logic.”

“She makes a fair point,” Rossi says.

“It’s unfounded,” Hotch ignores him, still dead set on irritating you. “Until you talk to her mother, don’t jump to any conclusions about her behavior.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Until I do?”

“Yes, you will be talking to her mother when we get on the ground. Morgan will go with you.” He nods to Derek. “Reid, you and JJ get set up at the precinct. Prentiss, Rossi, and I will go to the middle school. We’ll meet back at the precinct to discuss our next steps.”

You share a look with Morgan before sinking back in your chair, glaring at the file instead of Hotch.

It's going to be a long fucking day.

[totheseus]

I need to know. How would the creeps respond to meeting a cat in the street? Any creeps of your choice (please be Toby.)

-☕

HOW THE CREEPS RESPOND TO MEETING A CAT

ft. Ticci Toby, Eyeless Jack, Jeff the Killer, Homicidal Liu, Kate the Chaser

TICCI TOBY

A cat? Walking up to him? Kinda unheard of, really.

Either way, he's fucking melting on the spot. Immediately scooting as close as he can get.

Doesn't really get personal space, so if the cat is skittish it's probably not sticking around for long.

In all honesty, he's batshit terrified his tics will scare the cat.

Probably tried to take the cat with him.

(It has an owner.)

EYELESS JACK

He is NOT The stoic big guy he likes to portray himself as.

He's... very calm, actually. Probably a "candles, pillows and quiet music" kinda guy.

So, cats are absolutely his thing.

Cats probably flock to him to be honest. Despite his appearance, he's a calm presence to be around.

The gentlest ever with cats. Worried he'll hurt the cat somehow (big claws and all.)

The type to start going "you little critter."

Leaves kibble out for stray cats, actually. He thinks they're peaceful to watch, that he's doing some good to the world.

JEFF THE KILLER

This man is a fucking buffoon.

It's gonna need to be the calmest, friendliest cat ever to not immediately go sprinting away.

He probably goes sprinting full force up to the thing.

In the unlikely event it DOES stick around, Jeff... doesn't know what to do with it.

Like. Does he pick it up?

He's a dog kinda guy. Not that he's adverse to cats, but he's only really had dogs. Not a clue what to do with a cat.

Tries to feed it some random junk he finds in his pockets (i.e a half eaten protein bar.)

Also probably tries to steal it.

HOMICIDAL LIU

Ah, another absolute sweetheart with cats.

Be so real, he sits and reads books with a cat curled up on his lap.

Honestly, probably already has a cat actually.

He knows exactly what to do. Gentle, petting in all the right spots.

He doesn't know Jack feeds the stray cats, so he ALSO leaves out spare kibble.

Likes to watch the cats grow healthy.

He basically owns a pack of stray cats. One day, sooner or later, he's coming back to the manor with 50 cats following suit.

KATE THE CHASER

Surprisingly? Not that interested.

I don't get it either.

She doesn't really care that much for it. She's not that big a dog person either, she just... doesn't care for animals too much.

Being so honest, she's probably got far bigger priorities.

Will stop for the others to go pet it, maybe considers it.

But if she's on her own? Sorry, she's sprinting straight off.

Apologies if it wasn't the most accurate! This is off of my understanding of the characters, so it might not be the most correct. Enjoy, coffee. :)

[fxckn-sxck-fr]

im living for your writing🙏🏻

can you do yandere nsfw alphabet with hal? its okay if you dont, thank uuuu😭😭💕

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 ����𝐀𝐋 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐀𝐋𝐏𝐇𝐀𝐁𝐄𝐓…

!!! 18+ THEMES, GN reader, dom Hal, general coercive behavior, possible non-con, Hal being a freak, this would take forever to properly warn, I’m sorry.

Omg, this is my first time ever doing a NSFW alphabet post. I can’t believe I’ve never done one. I’m kinda nervous, but let’s see.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Hal’s aftercare game is surprisingly strong. There’s a couple of minutes where he’ll hold you against his chest, thumb stroking gently against your hip as he mutters about how good you were for him.

Now, cleanup is a bit of a different story. He’d rather stay inside of you for as long as possible, meaning he might just use whatever’s closest to wipe you down so he doesn’t have to pull out. But he also likes post-sex showers, too. He’ll even carry you there. It’s the least he could do after absolutely destroying you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I don’t know… I’ve given this a lot of thought… maybe it’s a tie between your neck and your hips. Neck because he loves to mark it, and hips because this man loves to hold ‘em. And, hey, he’ll mark your hips, too.

On your side of things, it depends on how tolerant you are of Hal. If you’re a less than willing partner, I can’t really see you liking any of him, LMAO. And I’d hate to speak on your behalf, but hear me out. Hal has some hot hands. I will be expanding upon this later, just you wait.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He loves to cum on your face. When your nose scrunches up a bit at the feeling of his release dripping all over you, when you look up at him with one eye squeezed shut so cum doesn’t get in it… you look so pathetic. So adorable. Such an ego-boost on his part, and lord only knows he needs more of that.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I mean, let’s be honest, is there anything really “secret” about what he likes to do to you? Dirty, yes, but “secret”? Mmm, I don’t know about that. I guess maybe the closest thing is that he’s got voyeuristic tendencies. Yes, he talks about making you feel good all the time, but it’s easy to assume he gets off on that because it’s him that’s making you feel good; an egotistical thing. And while that’s certainly part of it, he genuinely does get horny from just seeing you so worked up. You’re just hot like that.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Yeah, I’d say he’s pretty experienced. He’s gotten around a bit and knows a thing or two about having a good time. Finds out what makes you cum relatively quick (unfortunately for you; he will abuse this).

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Hal will do just about anything. Sometimes, it comes down to convenience. Though he is partial to doggy style, where he can hold your head down and just take what he wants. He also likes various standing positions when he’s fucking you in tight spaces.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He can get a bit goofy, but mostly as a way to tease you. Making you all flustered takes top priority.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s got thick hair, but it’s well maintained. A hint of a happy trail, darker pubic hair. He likes to keep it short.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Depends. Is this an angry fuck situation? No romance. Just rough and streamy. Is he feeling a bit more vulnerable, or it’s your first time initiating it? Extremely soft. Very romantic. Lots of kisses and praises. Loves to talk you through it, albeit sometimes with that condescending tone, but if you’re too horny to notice, then it’s whatever.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Before winning you over (or just straight-up kidnapping you), he jerked off so often. Maybe once a day, even. But having you in his life means he never has to masturbate when he can just have you! Yes, y’all fucked a lot for the first couple of weeks. He had a lot of it to get out of his system.

Afterwards, the only times he really has to masturbate is if he’s on a mission without you. But it just doesn’t feel the same now that he’s felt you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Biting. Bites. Big biter over here. Did I mention he likes to bite you?

He has a daddy kink. I said it. And if you don’t agree, we can meet in the middle with a sir kink. I won’t accept anything less, though. This man likes to have some sort of power over you.

Disgusting somno pervert. Can’t even keep his hands off you even when you’re asleep. Absolutely no shame.

Finally, cockwarming. For the times he just wants intimacy.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anytime. Anywhere. Places like public bathrooms or alleyways are usually for when he’s too jealous to wait for when the two of you are home alone, so for the optimal Hal experience (where he can actually focus on what he’s doing better), he likes anywhere in his apartment.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Honestly, you could just look at Hal and he’d be like, “that’s hot, I want you.” He really loves your obedience. Stroke his ego in any way and he’s hard.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He does not like anything that relinquishes his control over you. Sure, he may be willing to let you set the pace, but he’s the one calling the shots.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Call him the oral master. He is wicked good with his tongue, knowing exactly what to do with it. He’ll go down on you as a reward every now and then, but if you’re nice enough, then you’ll know to return the favor.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

More often than not, he’s probably a bit more on the rougher side. Of course, this is skewed a bit due to the times he’s jealous and/or angry, so don’t get things twisted; again, he’s willing to let you set the pace. It just depends on how compliant you are.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

As much as Hal would love to believe he’d never “stoop this low,” you already know they happen a lot. He just can’t help it, okay?

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

While he’s not exactly an exhibitionist, he sure as hell doesn’t care if people know. This man has pulled you into some hella risky places for a quick fuck.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Lots of stamina. He could go for hours. Many rounds. Especially when he’s pissed off.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Ahh. Freaky Lantern ring ask, my beloved. The galaxy has entrusted him with the world’s most versatile sex toy, and he is for sure using it to its fullest potential. I don’t see him using it on himself, so you’re on the receiving end of Hal’s twisted imagination.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s a piece of shit. Even when you’re good, he can’t help but be a little mean. But, hey, it’s better to be good and allowed to cum than to be bad and tortured for an eternity. Pick your battles.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

While he mostly tries to keep his sounds at bay, the occasional groan does slip through. He has the potential to be loud, it’s just that he’d rather hear your sounds over his. Other than that, he does talk a lot, along with frequent curses.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

His natural sweaty and musky smell actually kinda hits different. It’s a little earthy, a little spicy. Kind of reminiscent of Russian Sage. Y’all could get done with a damn workout of a fuck and most people who get a whiff of his after-sex smell would just think he’s got an interesting cologne. Pleasant, just interesting.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Maybe a little above average in size. Girthy and leans towards the right.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Very high. He’ll mellow out a bit after initially getting his hands on you, but it’s still high. Good luck dealing with his horny ass!!

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Normally, he’d much rather wait until you fall asleep first, even when he’s super tired. But on days where he just wants intimacy and softness, there’s a chance he’ll actually fall asleep first. Either way, he’s got you in a death grip, so you’re not weaseling your way out of his arms anytime soon.

[creedslove]

You are send a picture, happy face, 😁 smile with little caption, he miss you and be at home in a couple of days.

You send him spicy photo and say, you miss him too.

Featuring: Javier Peña, Joel Miller, Agent Whiskey and Dave York x f!reader

A/N: I wasn't sure if you meant this ask for one Pedro boy specifically or not, so I wrote for a bunch of them ❤️

Javier Peña: texting Javi a picture wasn't technically possible at the time, so let's say that instead of sending him a pic, you took a naughty polaroid of yourself, wrote about how much you'd missed him on the back of it and tucked it in the middle of his things when he was packing his suitcase to fly to Medellin on business. Once he gets to his hotel room and finds it, he would go hard immediately and the only solution would be jerking off to your picture

Joel Miller: Joel is outta town on business and he is forced to share the hotel room with his brother Tommy, which is something that doesn't please him at all, but it was the cheapest accomodation and it was only for a weekend, so when his phone buzzes and he sees you sent him a picture, he groans at the immediate reaction has it and he quickly texts you back a pic of his bulge, over his jeans. He is a little annoyed he can't sext you properly without his brother being around all the time bothering him and wanting to make small talk

Agent Whiskey: Jack is the king of sexting and facetiming for erotic purposes and no one could ever convince me otherwise. In fact, chances are he is actually the one who is facetiming you first, his cock already hard and he's stroking himself under his pants. If he gets a spicy picture he ain't even bothering texting you, he's straight up calling you and trying to convince you to undress so you can masturbate together 🔥👁️🫦👁️

Dave York: Dave travels a lot on business and unlike a lot of wives who worry about being cheated on, you worry about your husband getting killed, so your first priority is texting him to see he's alive and then, once you see that yes, he is alive, you can let your lust take over. Dave would probably already jerk off once he got to his hotel room, the kills often make too much adrenaline run through his body and a good way to relax and calm down is to rub one off in the shower, so he would think of you and do it; if you sent him a pic, that's even better, and if he's seriously horny, he would definitely send you a pic of his cock in return, just so your mouth waters ;)

____

[jqmalikhsgib]

astrology

six

to say your date went horribly wrong is an understatement. the guy didn’t even care enough to ask you any questions. in fact he didn’t stop talking about himself.

when you got home you immediately took a shower and headed downstairs to eat some ice cream. wanting to drown your sorrows in something sweet.

“eating ice cream this late could spoil your stomach.”

you jumped before sighing in relief.

“sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. may i?”

you simply nod. you grab an extra spoon for aaron as you both sit down and dig into the ice cream.

“im guessing the date didn’t go as well as planned?”

you scoffed. “worse. i think that guys more in love with himself than anything.”

aaron smiles. “i know the type. we meet cops like that all the time. so full of themselves they never stop to think about anything else. what happened that turned you off first?”

you stayed silent. you made a promise to yourself not to get too personal with him any longer. you couldn’t allow your silly crush to become anything more—more than it already had—you were already far gone. anymore you’d confess your undying affection to a man who only saw you as an employee.

aaron sighs.

“what happened to you?”

you frowned.

“what do you mean?”

“im a profiler, yn. its my job to notice behavior. you’ve been—you’ve been weird lately.”

“aaro—hotch,” you cleared your throat. “im just trying to be professional.”

“professional?”

you nod. “setting boundaries. im just someone you pay to take care of jack. i adore that kid more than anything and i like my job. love it! i don’t wanna lose that.” you state.

“and you won’t. jack loves you too. you’re the second closest thing he has to a parent. so whatever is going on i promise you won’t lose your job.”

you took a deep breath.

“i guess—as cliche as this is gonna sound—i read too much into our relationship. i—i developed a silly little crush and i got the message that it was all in my head.” you felt a weight being lifted from your shoulders as you admitted the truth.

aaron hums. he grabs you hand and caresses it gently.

“it wasn’t .” aaron whispered.

you look at him completely shocked.

“im not good at this, yn. haven’t been since haley passed. i—i tried to move on but it just, it never felt right. with you, it’s easy to talk to. i haven’t felt that in a really long time and i don’t wanna fuck it up. i care about you and so does jack. in the end, if this doesn’t work, it affects my son. i don’t want him to lose someone else i bring into our lives. it’s why i brought that woman home. i was trying to get you out of my system but it backfired extremely. i—i don’t wanna lie, i kept picturing you. even almost said your name.” aaron admitted with a smirk. you blushed.

“oh—”

aaron chuckles. “i want to see where this goes. i do! i just want to make sure that jack doesn’t get hurt in the process.”

you shake your head. “i guarantee that jack will be my main priority. even if—even if we don’t work out. he means more to me than anything, aaron.”

aaron nods approvingly.

“id like to take you out. normally we’re free weekends. how about this upcoming saturday?”

you smile and nod your head a little too enthusiastically.

aaron kisses the back of your hand. “get some sleep, sweetheart. ill see you in the morning.”

you give him another smile before saying goodnight. you wait until he was out of view before squealing silently.

you head upstairs to your bedroom and get some much needed rest. so glad the night ended the way it did.

aaron woke to the smell of bacon. he yawns as he gets out of bed and head straight to the shower. when he gets out and gets ready for work he heads downstairs. he sees his son sitting and enjoying breakfast next to you.

“daddy! yn made bacon. it’s good, daddy.”

aaron smiles at the both of you. “yeah? maybe i should have some.” he takes a piece of bacon from your plate. he playfully smack his hand.

“get your own hotchner!”

aaron smirks at you as he takes a bite of the piece of meat he stole from your plate. jack giggles.

“you and yn made up?”

aaron nods his head. “we did. you sir need to get ready for school.”

“im so excited for school, dad! today is show and tell in miss peas class. gonna bring the necklace mommy made for me.”

aaron smiles.

“why don’t you get ready buddy. gonna take you to school today.”

“not yn?”

aaron shakes his head. “it’s still yn day off. remember she gets two nights, buddy. come on, go get ready.”

“okay!” jack ran upstairs. you get up and put the dirty dishes in the sink. aaron simply turns you around and wraps his hand around your waist.

“i really wanna kiss you.”

“why don’t you?” you whisper.

aaron smirks as he caressed your cheek. he kisses you passionately. you’ve never been kissed like this in a very long time—if ever!—it felt right. you never believed in that silly ‘i felt sparks’ thing until this very moment. it was like fireworks were going off.

aaron pulls away gently. he smiles before kissing the top of your head.

“can’t wait for this weekend.” he whispered.

“neither can i. why does it have to be monday?” you frown. aaron chuckles before pulling away.

he heads jacks footsteps, smiling at his son. “alright buds! time to head out. we don’t wanna be late, yeah?”

“we’re always the first ones there, dad.” jack says matter of factly. he wasn’t wrong. when aaron took him to school he’d get there at six forty five. aaron had to be the first one to arrive at work. he needed to make sure jack was safe and secure in the school building as early as possible before heading to work.

“bye yn. love you!” jack called out. you smiled and waved. “love you too, jack! have a great day at school, buds.”

aaron smiles before waving to you. when they leave you call spencer.

“hey. is everything okay? how was your date?”

“yeah! everything is fine. the date was horrendous.”

“sorry to hear that.”

“don’t be. in the end things worked out.”

“that’s good. what are you not telling me?”

you smile. you weren’t a hundred percent ready to tell spencer anything yet. you wanted to make sure that this really works out.

“nothing. can’t a girl just miss her best friend?! i feel like we rarely talk anymore.”

“yeah. im sorry about that. it’s just—there’s this girl,”

“girl you say? do tell!”

“i met her during a case. i don’t know—she lives in arizona. she’s great! and the commute would be worth it,”

“but?”

“but relationships don’t work for people like us. with out jobs it’s hard, you know? it’s why i stayed single for so long. it’s why hotch and haley ended in divorce. i just don’t think people with our jobs can actually date on a deeper level.” spencer admitted.

you frowned at that confession. “spence, the right girl is out there for you. she—im one thousand percent positive the person you’re meant to be with won’t mind the crazy weird hours you have. as long as you show them exactly how much you love and care for them they’ll understand.”

“you think? it’s just with the job and the distance—”

“im positive!”

“you know you always know what to say to make me feel better.”

“that’s what im here for. we should hang out soon though. i miss hearing my brother spill some weird fact that could probably save my life or even start a conversation.”

spencer laughs. “the team should be free this weekend. why don’t we get together saturday?”

“i can do saturday evening. is that okay?”

“yeah! i should get going though. hotch is probably already in his office and i have to ask him something. thanks for calling. i love you.”

“love you too, spence! have fun catching the bad guy.” you ended the call before getting ready for the day.

[jlepixie]

gustav nsfw alphabet? LOVED the bill one<33

hi love! thank you so much, I really loved writing it. And yes of course I can, thank you for the request, I am not the best writer for Gustav only because I have read only a couple of stories with him. I hope you like it and if is there anything I can do for you please tell me!

╰ ୨ Gustav nsfw alphabet ୧ ╯

༶⋆˙⊹｡⋆ʚ♡⃛ɞ ✩ ˛˚.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

I feel like he is the type of guy that would seek validation but wouldn't straight up ask for it. Does he want to know he did a good job? Sure, but he would prefer to know he did the best job. And yes, he would give the necessary aftercare, like cleaning you, changing sheets, making sure you drink something, everything its on the menu and will give it to you with a stone face only because his calculating every move. But he is a man that needs the emotional aftercare, he needs his cuddles and appreciation, and you gotta give it to him without making a fuss over it, otherwise he would close himself more.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and their partners)

Gustav goes to the gym and im sure of it, he is proud of it, this man has to keep his arms worked out to beat those drums. Im fully sure that his favourite part on himself are the muscles, whether are those on the arms, thighs or even abdomen, don't be fulled by his chubby appearance because he is packing. Gustav is the guy that wouldn't care too much about the looks and he would definitely appreciate any type of body but I feel that he would be attracted more to tick thighs.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum)

He is a respectful man so the condom stays on, but sometimes when you two experiment other things I believe another place he likes to cum is on your chest.

D = Dirty secret (self explanatory, a secret of theirs)

As I said before, Gustav seeks validation even if he wouldn't come directly to you for it. He wants to be vulnerable around you but safe, he wouldn't admit that he most craves to be pampered by you. Good luck getting him to admit it, though, even if he behaves in ways that make it painfully obvious at times. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they)

Gustav is experienced, that's for sure, but not as much as Tom or Bill. He knows what he is doing, but he would need minimul help to get to your expectations. He wants to be perfect for you in every type of way.

F = Favorite position

Any position where he feels like he’s powerful. Holding you against a wall, bending you over a table, having a flexible partner he can control in bed to have you in all sorts of positions for his pleasure, any face down/ass up, although he will be surprisingly pleased if you really insists on flipping him over and riding him. Expect a wide-eyed and shocked look on Gustav. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious or goofy at the moment?)

I feel like he would be more serious than usual only because he wants to do a good job but when you are the one that is lighting the mood, Gustav would crack a joke or two, and you two would end up laughing and hugging in the middle of it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they)

Some parts are trimmed, some shaved, and when the shaved part are growing before having time to shave them again, he would be annoyed by them being itchy so it will let them grow until realising its time to shave them again.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment?)

Intimacy is Gustav's biggest priority. Unless it was a rather a kinky night, he liked keeping it slow and sweet with you. He has a huge praise kink, as I said before, giving and receiving, and wouldn't hesitate to treat you like a goddes. He’d tell you often that he loved you and thought that you were beautiful. He’d run his fingertips across your skin and all your curves.

J = Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)

At the beginning of your relationship, he was kinda shy to ask you for help sorting himself out so most of the time he jerked off to release the tension. As he got more comfortable he’d be more willing to invite you to fix the problem but there would still be times when you couldn't or when he was on a tour. After a while, he'd start looking at pictures of yourself that you sent to him and just stroke himself with you in his mind.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Size difference is one of his main kinks. Marks. Being rough. Being absolutely filthy and messy. But also, he would keep in mind to be gentle and loving, somehow.

L = Location (favourite places to do the do)

He mainly prefers a bed, but it could be anywhere, anyones bed, the couch, or even doing a quickie in the bathroom under the stage. As long as he is with you, having fun, he wouldn't care too much if its the mood set.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You. You are his motivation for everything, not only sex. And another thing that motivates him is the thought that he can improve himself and his skills. And being closer to you, physical and emotional.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do)

Gustav is up for everything, but not sharing. That is something he wouldn't do, share you in any way. You are his, and he is yours. So don't even try to joke about it because he will get a little insecure and close in himself more.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill)

I feel like he is not a big fun of receiving, he respects you too much for it. But he wouldn't deny it that sometimes when he is really, really stressed, especially on tours, he would like to see you on your knees. Gustav is totally giving one of the best orals, that's one of his ways of worshiping you.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)

For the most part, Gustav would be sensual with you. He wanted to savour your body, not break it (just sometimes). He wants to feel every bit of your skin on his. Like every human, he has his frustrations, especially being part of a band, of course he wants to come home at you to help him take the anger and frustration away. We all can admit that he can also be rough.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often)

Not a fan, but he doesn't have a choice on tours especially. Like any man he needs his lover in a not orthodox way, so quickies are a must on brakes, but be sure that he would step up his game in the hotel room when he has all night just to please you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment, do they take risks)

That depends a lot, he would be whiling to experiment anything with you but not all the time, he likes more or less to keep it safe and not change too much on your rutine.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for, how long do they last)

This man uses his arms for hours to practice a song, if you think he doesn't have the stamina, you are wrong. Honestly, in my opinion I could see him being able to cum around three times before it started to hit him. By round 5-6 he'd start shooting blanks and would have to tap out by the time you reached 8. Not too bad.

T = Toy (do they own toys? do they use them?)

Gustav is not a big of toys, he doesn't own any and he wouldn't be hurt or upset if you would use them on yourself because he knows he can get busy. If you ask him to use some on you he wouldn't say no, so its mainly up to you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Especially when he is on tour he loves exchanging pictures with you, so take that as one way of teasing. But otherwise he would keep it chill in public and just give a naughty remark on you, maybe about the way you dressed ("I love how this looks on you, can't wait to take it off when we get home")

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

A growler and grunter. Can be completely silent if he puts his mind to it, but prefers not to be. He loves having his mouth close to your ear so you can hear all his pants and grunts and growls and filthy things.

W = Wild Card (get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Occasionally when you blow him off he cuts faster than usual. Only because he founds it sexy when you get on your knees to please him while looking up at him. Usually he would try to pull off from your mouth, not knowing if you would like to shallow or not, but if you are looking at him in a way that says that you are going for the big one, he would get surprised and think about it all day.

X = X-Ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants)

I said before this man has muscles right? Well be sure he is packing as well down there. He is proud of it and he knows you got lucky on that one.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

I would say it's not extreme. Most of the time you were the one to initiate things but he’d hardly ever said no. But otherwise he loves it when you two do it, not only because he gets closer to you but the pleasure is heavenly.

Z = ZZZ (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He would definitely need a nap after, but not before he cleans you up and says how grate you were.

© 2023 jlepixie.  ─  please do not copy,  repost or translate any of my works on other platforms without my permission. 

[babydollmarauders]

I’d love to see a tense and restless Jack on his and the reader’s first night out since El was born. Like moms are usually the tense ones, but Jack can’t even think straight because it’s weird not having his kid around and not knowing if she’s okay or not.

“Jacky, she’ll be okay.” my hand rubs circles on my husbands back, our daughter held tightly in his arms as i try and reassure him that the four month old will be okay without us.

“there’s prepared bottles in the fridge, you’ll just have to warm it up. and you know the diapers and wipes are in the diaper bag on the table. she just ate like twenty minutes ago, so she might only need one bottle in about two hours, if we’re not home by then. um-”

Jack is cut off by Quinn’s sigh.

“bro, it’ll be fine! you have a whole house of babysitters right now!” Quinn reminds his brother. “go. take. your. wife. on. a. date.”

Jack heaves out his own sigh and nods, finally handing El over to Luke, who stands next to Quinn.

“yeah! remind her she’s sexy, or else i might become El’s new stepdad!” Trevor chimes in from his spot on the couch. i roll my eyes as Jack lets out a sarcastic laugh.

“my wife knows i think she’s very sexy. how do you think we got here in the first place?” at Jack’s words, i lightly smack his shoulder, huffing out a chuckle.

“let’s go, babe. just ignore Trevor, i’m not sure why he thinks he would be a fit decision for a stepdad.” i joke, pushing my husband along towards the front door. “if anyone, it’d be Alex!”

Trevor gasps at my quip, swinging around to look at me.

“i resent that!” he calls out.

“i knew i was daddy material.” Alex shrugs as he walks out of the kitchen and into the living room, dropping his weight onto the couch.

“never say that again.” Cole laughs, stretching his leg over from the armchair he sits in to kick Alex’s leg.

Jack rolls his eyes as i laugh at our friends, a small smile playing on his lips.

“let’s go to dinner, J.” i tell him, finally able to pull him out of the house.

Jack spends the entire drive to the restaurant gripping the steering wheel tight, his eyes glancing down towards his phone in the cup holder every minute.

“Jacky.” i sigh as we’re seated at our table, him immediately checking his phone as i pick up my menu.

“hmm? yeah?” his eyes flicker towards me briefly before setting his phone back down.

“she’s fine. i promise.” i reassure, my voice gentle as i snake my hand to rest on top of his on the table.

“i’m just worried.” he confesses, as if i couldn’t already tell. “what if something happens? we should be there, we’re her parents.”

i can tell the guilt of any hypothetical situation is eating away at him, and i’d be lying if i said it wasn’t setting in slightly for me. but i know that our daughter is in good hands. she has five uncles who love her, watching over her right now and she’ll be okay.

“i know you’re worried, and i know you feel guilty at the thought of us not being there if something were to happen. but we need this, Jack.” his shoulders square when he realizes i didn’t use a nickname, showing him that i’m serious.

“it’s been probably five months since we’ve had a date night. four months since we’ve spent any time to ourselves. there has to be at least some semblance of romance still in order for us to to not turn into a pair of zombie parents who drift apart.”

my voice trails off at the end, and i know he knows i’m referring to my own parents. who after i was born, took their roles as parents much too seriously, thinking i was their only priority, never taking a date night, never putting their relationship first, until eventually they grew apart. they stayed married, but it was somehow worse, as they had fought and became locked in a toxic marriage that hadn’t done any of us any good. they became overbearing and overprotective of me as a result. which only ended badly.

“hey.” Jack coos, squeezing my hand in his to ground me back to this moment. “i won’t let that happen. i promise to you, and to El.”

a smile pulls at my lips at his words.

“i know.” i assure him. “and i know it’s hard to leave her right now, it’s hard for me too. but it’s the first time, eventually, it’ll get easier. i hope.”

he chuckles at my last words, nodding his head.

“i hope so too.” he tells me. “it’s different when i’m on roadies because you’re there. you’re the one taking care of her. but…”

Jack wrinkles his nose.

“my brothers? our friends? do we really think they’re capable?”

i bark out a laugh, covering my mouth to try and muffle the sound in the crowded restaurant. a grin spreads across my husband’s face at my laugh, making my heart race like when we first started dating.

“i really think they’ll be okay.” i giggle. “she’s their niece, they don’t want anything to happen to her.”

“you’re right.” Jack nods.

“i always am.” i shrug and he playfully rolls his eyes as a waitress finally steps up to our table. as i’m telling the girl my order, i can’t help but notice Jack checking his phone again, even typing what i assume is a check-in text to his brothers.

once the waitress leaves, Jack’s phone buzzes on the table and he reaches out for it like his life depends on it. reading his incoming text, his shoulders slump in relief and i furrow my eyebrows at him.

“she’s asleep.”

[halfmoondaze]

Yesss can I request a Jack fluff please?

Reader is a busy student and she hasn’t had time to sit down and spending time with Jack. Jack understands how it’s not always good putting time off of things school related but really misses reader. One day he’s at home by himself really missing reader and keeps thinking about her but can’t text or call her because she’s in class. Jack remembers that he has a bottle of y/n’s perfume and cute plushie of her favorite animal. He sprays the perfume on the plushie and cuddles with it until she gets dismissed from class and drives straight to Jack’s house for a couple of hours before going home. He tells and shows how much he missed reader to the point where he had to have the animal plushie with her perfume in his arms when walking around his house 😭❤️ when Jack finally has reader with him, he can’t help but follow her everywhere she goes from one place to another, even waiting for her outside the bathroom😂Just being so attached to her.

Threads of Longing

Finals were only a few weeks ahead and studying was Y/N’s only priority right now. 

She would wake every day at 5 am. At first, she was able to have control of her sleeping routine, but as finals approached, Y/N would find herself growing so anxious, she would be unable to sleep, and instead would just study and just function off of coffee. 

Because Y/N was constantly on the go, Jack was barely able to see her despite living under the same room, and he couldn’t help but miss her. But he didn’t want to be a needy boyfriend, so he would just settle for dangling conversations, while also letting her know he was there for her whenever he needed him. 

Y/N was currently sitting by the kitchen counter with her laptop and iPad mindlessly taking notes while Jack who has just woken up, walked into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea. 

“Hey” 

Y/N continued typing away oblivious to her surroundings.

He gently placed his hand on her shoulder, and Y/N jumped startled and turned to him.

“Jack” she sighed putting her hands on her face. “You scared me”

“I just wanted to say hi…..but you were too concentrated” he scratched the back of his neck and smiled. “Did you sleep alright?”

“I wouldn’t count sleeping for 4 hours alright, but I’m managing” she laughed to herself.

“Do you want me to make you some coffee?” 

Y/N closed her laptop and gathered her things.  

“Thanks. But I gotta run, I wanna make the most of the two hours I have free before my class” 

“Ok”

Y/N kissed him and left. 

Jack sighed. He longed for her presence and found himself absent minded walking back to their shared bedroom. He found Twinkle, Y/N’s childhood plushie sitting in the corner of her room. He picked it up and inhaled the faint scent of Y/N. He got an idea. 

He walked to their shared bathroom and picked up Y/N’s perfume and sprayed it all over the plushie. Then he inhaled it again. ‘That was much like it’ he thought to himself satisfied.

And just like that, he found himself cuddled in their shared bed at her side of her bed cuddling Twinkle until he fell asleep. 

Jack eyes fluttered open as he woke up from his slumber to the familiar sound of the keys jiggling. 

He practically raced to the living room as he saw Y/N entering the through the front door. 

“Babe” he said as he wrapped his arms around her. 

Y/N giggled and hugged him back. 

“Hey bubs” she kissed him. 

Y/N stopped in her tracks as she smelled him. 

“Is that- Is that my perfume?” she smiled.

“Yeah…..I was scared I was going to forget your scent” he said sarcastically as he shrugged. 

Y/N felt her heart heavy. 

“Aww Jack” she hugged him tighter. “You know I’m only a few steps away, right?”

“I know but, I just barely see you. We just don’t talk as much. And I miss you” 

“I’m sorry I know I’ve been distant-” she cupped his cheek. 

“Hey, hey. You have nothing to be sorry about. You’re busy and I get that. You need more pressure than what you already have” 

“I know but you’re my boyfriend and I haven’t paus none of my attention to you and its not fair” she sighed. “I’ll make it up to you. What about a movie night?” 

“Babe, you’ve been awake since 5 am. We both know you’ll be asleep five minutes into the movie” he laughed. 

“Sorry” 

“I have a better idea. We ca have a bath together and you tell me all about your day?” 

“Sounds like a plan” 

Jack and Y/N walked upstairs to make the most of their time together.

[spookygayferret]

i wrote. a thing?? it's more hurt/comfort gentlebeard for freaks (like me) who are really into that shit.

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death

Relationship(s): Ed/Stede

Rating: M (Mature)

Title: The Flow

CW: Ed having a panic attack, references to Ed being abused, Ed having abandonment issues, Ed's friends being shitty

Summary:

When Ed has a panic attack at a music festival, he is helped by a kind stranger.

Ed made a face–that face–that face he always did–Anne knew what it meant. Almost jabbed herself right there–right in the eye with the mascara brush, distracted.

“You said you’d come, Eddie,” she reminded him.

Ed groaned–fuck. Yeah, that figured. Fucking figured–she’d remember that. Always forgot his coffee order, never forgot when Ed made a promise. Priorities straight and narrow.

He winced, flinched a little–touched his black-polished nails on the porcelain sink. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to–middle age had taken a lot from him, but Ed was always down to party–or at least that was what he told himself, drumming fingers on the sink shoulder to shoulder with Anne Bonny. It’d been years since she came over–and of course when she finally reached out, it was for this.

“He’s good with…this?” said Ed. “He’s cool?”

They hadn’t talked really–since their parties, really old parties–in university, when Anne dated Jack. And Jack was dickish, but okay–he didn’t mind that Anne was Ed’s ex–didn’t make it weird, Jack was just–kind of an asshole, insecure and doing stupid every minute Ed looked at him. Jack was fun–at least back in those days, before graduation. Before messy breakups.

“You know Jack,” was all Anne said.

Ed relaxed–a little bit anyway.

Ed used to be excited about Revfest. But it’d been years since he went–he was kind of busy, having a mental breakdown over the career he’d come to hate. When Anne called and asked about Revfest, Ed couldn’t think of a single reason to just blow her off–not like he had plans. And when she showed up at his house to make sure they were still on, Ed couldn’t exactly back out and trust she wouldn’t give him grief. They both knew he needed this.

So Ed dredged up a pair of red leather pants, sequined silver up the outer legs–and a loose spaghetti strap black tank that said True Trans Soul Rebel–put his hair in two braids. He got ready with Anne in front of the bathroom mirror, shadowed his big brown eyes and freckled his cheeks with pastel purple glitter. Made himself look like he wasn’t a total wreck of a person–Ed wasn’t good at that, pretending he wasn’t coming unraveled at the seams.

Anne drove, Mary rode passenger–Ed slept the two hours. They were linking up with Jack at Revfest. And Ed was–when he woke up, rubbed sleep out of his eyes–getting a little excited.

His excitement quelled, when he found out Jack didn’t come alone–Jack’s new boyfriend Felix, this skinny foodie photographer guy about eight years Jack’s junior. That brought the total odd-numbered–and Ed was the only guy there who hadn’t brought a date–thought this was just a hangout, not that everyone (except him) was coming pre-coupled.

Read the rest here:

[yulin-pop]

↛ ❀ 2023 Kickoff

Kalim Al-Asim

“ Are we best friends or just friends?” | “ Do friends kiss??”

Note: Based off of me and my crush. This may be non sense because I got lazy at the end.

You knew Jamil would kick your ass if he knew you were flirting with Kalim. But its not your fault Kalim is so cute!

Jamil has taken notice of your interest in Kalim but you always have an excuse ready if he ever tries to confront you.

It kinda feels forbidden with you being a commoner and from another world while he’s a prince.

Your relationship was complicated— you couldn’t tell if he was being his usual friendly self or being more than just friendly whenever he grabbed your waist and casually held you like that.

It started off as a joke. Because that’s how it ALWAYS starts off. Very embarrassing on your part. It’s like setting up a trap and then falling into it.

You ended up spending a lot more time at Scarabia. Most of your friends complained, even Grim. But you pretty much drowned it out.

It really felt like Kalim could be your boyfriend.

“I really should be going but— I don’t wanna!” You threw yourself on Kalim’s lap while stretching your arms out.

He laughed, “Well, you don’t have to. You can stay over.”

You smiled but shook your head. “No I can’t do that…”

“Eh? Why not?” Kalim whined.

Yeah you were playing hard to get, you were aware how stupid you sounded. At times like this, you two felt more like a bantering couple.

People were talking about you two. Scarabia students spread some accurate rumors of you two. Probably not on purpose but it still ended up in your friend group. They weren’t happy at all.

Ace grabbed the collar of your uniform and shook you back and forth while interrogating you. Deuce, Epel, nor Jack did. much to help while Grim threatened to burn your hair.

“Kalim, what are your thoughts on dating?” You suddenly asked. You felt promoted to ask such a question because of all these rumors .

“Hmm…” He hummed for a moment, “I see it a lot. My relatives are always asking if I’ve got a partner yet. I guess it’s just not my top priority! But it’s still on my mind…” He spoke a bit slow in an unsure tone with his eyes gazing into yours.

You smiled, “Oh yeah? What is your top priority?”

“You, of course!”

You laughed in unison as you sat up to wrapped your arms around his neck.

You glanced off to the side and thought.

If we were dating, this would be a good time to kiss.

Why were you thinking this? You did this to yourself when you started acting this way towards a friend. Of course you couldn’t go complain to your friends because they’d laugh in your face. Then again you would also do the same thing.

You looked at him straight in his eyes. He could tell there was something off by how tense you were and your expression look as if you were gonna sneeze.

“Uh are you okay…?” He poked your cheek as he leaned in closer.

“Kalim!” You suddenly shouted his name. Then you went for it.

—

Now you didn’t know what to do. You stuck closer to Grim and randomly went silent in conversations. Even in class, you seemed spaced out. Maybe not spaced out but just bothered by something.

Grim already tried to ask you but you easily disregarded him. Unfortunately Ace and Deuce can be somewhat dense and didn’t realize your soured mood until half way into the school day.

You pouted to yourself in your seat as Grim ate all of your lunch that you were supposed to share.

“Grim, you just ate all of MC’s lunch.” Deuce pointed at the empty tray.

“Eh whatever, they always share lunch with Kalim anyway!” Ace teased but you showed a very bitter reaction.

Finally they notice…

“They’ve been all grouchy all morning!” Grim complained, you were being super rude today!

“I’m not being grouchy. You’re just high maintenance!” You spat back. You put your head down to slouch in your seat and let out a groan of distress.

“You’re completely ruining the mood for us!” Ace forcefully pulled you back up and shook you. “You’re gonna tell us what happened.”

Maybe your friends aren’t as mean as you thought.

They still reprimanded you for doing something so absurd almost like they were your guardians or something but they wanted to help you. But ideas from the ex-anemone heads weren’t very bright. Maybe the most direct approach would work in this situation.

Right as the last bell rang, you jumped out of your seat and made your way down the halls. You nearly crashed into an upperclassman but you stopped right in front of him.

“Do you know where Kalim is?”

“I think he went to the light music room. He was talking about practice before the bell rang.”

When you approached him, you almost forgot what you were gonna say. He greeted you curtly but didn’t have the usual upbeat attitude.

“Could we talk about.. last night?” You nervously said.

“Oh! It’s okay. If it’s better for you, we can just forget that ever happened.” He quietly said.

Somehow, that hurt to hear. You didn’t want to forget it. You shook your head and glanced to the side. You were at a loss.

“Are we best friends or just friends?” Kalim suddenly asked with a serious gaze.

“Do friends kiss?” You were asking yourself that. You did love him but maybe he saw it as just friendly banter.

“Uh well obviously not!” Kalim said without sarcasm. You almost forgot how honest could be. The two of you sighed in confusion.

“Well then— what are we…?”

That was a question neither of you could answer. You bit your lip and looked down.

“You know what… I like you! It’s okay if you don’t like me back yet! I still have time to woo you, right?”

“…Right?” You answered back. “But I do like you.”

He grabbed your shoulders and came closer. “But I didn’t do it right. I thought it was obvious. I wouldn’t go do that if I didn’t like you. My ma told me that love built in confusing feelings like this aren’t good! So I just gotta redo it.”

Honestly, he was just making it worse.

“If it’s okay with you. Then let’s restart. I’ll take you on a date!”

You nodded your head, you didn’t understand what he was trying to say.

“Great.” He let go of you and stepped away, “I’ll be going but please don’t forget. Bye bye!”

At this rate, he might kill you with all this tension.

[resistanceisfeudal]

Uncategorised finale thoughts:

The number of times I said "I dont care about this" out loud got a bit silly

Second only to "this doesn't feel like how the borg work"

I think Riker straight up forgot he has a kid to go home to

Jack reminiscing about all his dearest fondest memories from the last, what, two days? Absolutely sent me. 10/10

Something about the "Everyone gets a little something to do" structure of this borg cube heist is pleasing to me. I'll give them that

Presumably, thousands of people have died, right? This happy ending feels weird

Hey, Tuvok! Glad they bothered to remember that.

When was Shaw supposed to have recorded this message? Seriously. When? Post vadic taking over and pre borg taking over? Weird priorities.

Gabe really said "we can reconcile but only once you've saved the Galaxy three times"

"One year later" - cuts immediately to scene that in no way needed to happen one year later then cutting to a discontinuous scene that does. Editing. Guys, come on.

I cannot believe they're putting so much dramatic emphasis on the "engage/make it so/etc" thing. Like, that's a running joke in Discovery!

Laris died on the way back to her home planet.

Thoughts firmly in the salt category:

This whole season felt like an insult.

I saw some post using the phrase "Bury your gays" to describe this episode, which obviously had me worried for Seven and Raffi. But like, even though they survived what even is this? Why even include them? Why break them up if you're not going to do anything with that story beat?

M'talas system. What an obnoxious choice.

I still don't like Jack.

[filzmonster]

If you’re doing the ask game: Gilbert Nightray?

any excuse to talk about Gilbert Nightray tbh

First impression: I saw him being angsty in the rain during the intro for 0.2 seconds and I just knew he was going to be my fave.

Impression now: Honestly, it's been over ten years and I still can't really put into words how much this fictional character means to me.

To me, he has one of the most interesting, most well crafted character journeys I've ever seen. The way his entire loyalty complex is depicted, established and developed is something that still touches me very deeply. How he struggles with but ultimately pushes through his issues is just ,,,,,,,,, hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ,,,,,,,,, dare I say inspiring? Also, he got a lot of cool moments throughout the series and I'm very thankful for that <3

Favourite moment: This was a tough one because there are so manyyyyyyyy. But I'm gonna go with the one that impressed me the most from a 'the way this story is written' pov and that's the one where he shows up and saves Break from Fang and Lilly. I don't even know. Just thinking about this scene and the way it was set up - with Gilbert running towards Oz, Vincent manipulating him into thinking Break can take care of himself, his flashbacks to when Break told him to get his priorities straight, with him realizing that Break is blind, with him still chosing to run towards Oz and Vincent's sinister 'good riddance Hatter' smile, and then Gilbert laughing in all of their faces by saying 'screw my priorities, I can chose both' - still gives me chills. I so very clearly remember sitting in my bed at like 3am, reading it for the first time and just losing my mind over Gilbert showing up and kicking him in the back when no one, least of all Break, expected him to do that.

Idea for a story: One day I will write down the 'The Tragedy of Sablier never happend and Gilbert and Vincent and Alice grow up as Baskervilles with Oswald and Jack as their gay parents' story set to Bastille songs I have been dreaming about for 5 years. Y'all just wait.

Unpopular opinion: There should have been a last meaningful conversation between Break and Gilbert before Break dies.

I know a lot of people absolutely love that Break got to spend his last impactful scenes with Oz and Vincent, guiding these two through their last character development steps, but ,,,,,,, but.

It just makes me so mad that up until the very climax of Gilbert's character development (him burning off his left arm and then showing up to stand in front of Glen and declare his loyalty to Oz no matter what) there were so many conversations between these two from the very beginning, the parallels between both of them serving Masters, Break being aware that he is the cautionary tale for Gilbert and trying to guide him, Gilbert showing up and saving him, Break even going all I don't have to worry about him anymore while being chained to a wall, so sure that Gilbert is going to help Oz because even though he saw him shoot Oz he also saw through the compulsion and realized that Gilbert picked his side, Oz' side, and that he would ultimately pull through.

And yet. AND YET. Their last real interaction is Gilbert being furious at Break and blaming him for Oscar's death and then just kind of ignoring him and not even really acknowledging him/his impending death when they part ways in the ruins of Sablier and Break stays behind to die alone in the arms of Reim and Sharon.

Instead the focus is on Vincent and Oz, as if the last 20something volumes of their friendship and connection suddenly didn't matter anymore. I'm still disappointed about this 10 years later apparently, because just like Gilbert I simply cannot let things go.

Favourite relationship: Breakbert Oz. Whatever the hell he has going on with Oz in every shape, form and colour throughout the entire manga. I live and breathe for that shit. The angst, the loyalty, the doubt, the jealousness, the dismissiveness, the fucked-up-ness at times. The way they both trigger their respective issues at the start but then become each other's guiding light to becoming better versions of themselves and then ending up with this beautiful, trusting friendship where they both understand the other better and see them for who the other really is and still chose each other, despite everything. Fuck.

Favourite headcanon: Uff. I fear I am so out of touch with the source material these days that I don't really remember what was actually hinted at in the manga and what was just my interpretation of certain things?

I distantly remember him angsting about doing dirty work for the Nightrays at some point, so I have this headcanon that he worked as some sort of assassin/spy for them for a while? No idea if that's a true headcanon or just my imagination running wild with a throwaway line, but I like the idea of him being actually way more ruthless than he seems and very willing to go to drastical measures for the people he cares about without hesitation.

[nutzworth]

DAY 5: JANUARY 31, 2024 (i got to start reading more consistently.)

STATS: read for ~3 hrs pages read: 1052-1359. 307 pgs. act 4! slur count: 8 + 1 = 9 (john r slur on 1 of his defaced posters) silly count: 11 + 0 = 11 (i might have missed some. to be honest) piss count: 1/3

THOUGHTS: today started with john's alchemizing spree! i really like the alchemy even though i can NOT understand how the binary and codes quite work. john does though. johns really smart about alchemy in sburb specifically. this section also has a lot of funny john faces. i love this guy

FINALLY the end of dave and bros strife! jesus! been 2 sessions sicne it started! i said this last time but i think its SO INTERESTING how bro doesnt cut or stab dave in any way during the strife. they clash and lil cal gets torn up and daves sword gets 1/2ed and daves SYMBOL gets scratched but when hussie shows dave after the fight hes winded and bruised and battered but hes NOTABLY NOT BLOODY! obviously being bruised cus youre FIGHTING! WITH YOUR DAD! is bad and your dad (bro) is a criminal but. man. how much restraint was bro USING. to be SO PRECISE! did he have to choose between slashing dave and slashing cal in that split second? why else would he possibly have slashed cal? for paradox reasons? i really like dirk strider

the unofficial homestuck collection website is bugging out SO BAD for me. for so many flashes today the music just did not play. it SUCKS! but its fine i just play the music in another tab. i hope they fix that but i know its not priority

i really like the few dave logs i read today. dave is sooooo sad puppy on the other side of a cracked door that sees you and wants to get in the room but cant figure out how to push open the door so he just whines. "hello" "what are you doing" "man where are you" "are you there" he is so cute. in contrast the other dave log today was DAVE AND TAVROS!!!! HOORAY FOR TAVROS! and dave in this one is really funny hes so nonchalant and like "no man. if you want to have sex with a 13 yr old boy okay dude. im on board. time and place." and tavros is like UM! NO! IM GOOD! HAHA! }:) ! they are so funny. the striders are SO internet troll. dave does it flawlessly

KANAYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE KANAYA! SHES MY FAVORITE TROLL! shes so awesome in the kanaya/rose log she is so funny. start talking to this girl like "humans cant understand time travel when its really so simple youre all kind of dumb" and ending with "hey we should be friends". i literally love her

EXILES! not much happened with the exiles. introduced to aimless renegade. what a cop. pa harley heart! thanks for your guns pa!

THE FLASH WHEN ROSE ENTERS THE GAME IS SO COOOOOL!!!!!!!!! i really really like it unfortunately the sound didnt work so all the beats didnt hit quite right but they hit ENOUGH. SO COOL! I LOVE ROSE!!!! theres so much going on all the time for that girl. i love you rose

INTERMISSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i really like the intermission i think its so fun trying to parse what the hell is happening. i have GOT to read problem sleuth because so many of the things i find funny are straight up just problem sleuth bits

hussie averting the readers expectations with the like You have a deck of cards. ==> play solitaire With what cards? Dumbass? Fuck off. You only have your WAR CHEST. i think this is hussie like softdropping his rivalry with his audience. it starts with silly banter and then hes like im going to make a character representing the fandom and im going to kill her off (calliope)

the felt are SO COOL! if anyone knows all the pun names for them lmk. i only know a few obvious ones.

the intermission is SO gory. theres so much blood and death and guns and knives. like ok dude i get youre in mafia gangs or whatever but cool it on the blood and yucky faces! yeesh! there is also more crude jokes in it than normal i think. maybe cus these are real adults with pornography in their briefcases than like 13 yr olds. "jack king off" "you beat it(your heart) pretty often" "fist full of penis" etc

you kjnow what drives me crazy. the ACTUAL REAL TIMELINE of the intermission. or at least what it means for the rest of the comic. obviously the intermission is foreshadowing (esp when slick gets his eye and arm cut off; mentioning lord english; etc) but like. its MORE. when i first read homestuck i was under the impression that the intermission was just some other timeline in some universe. granted i dont remember slicks eye and arm getting nixed or karkat vantas reveal or lord english mention or anything that foreshadows anything. but NO! its NOT some other timeline! but it IS another universe. its ALTERNIA!!!!!!!!!!!

the story of jack noir (spades slick) as i know it is as follows: jack noir spawns in derse ==> commits a crime (probably shittalking the queen) ==> gets exiled to... um. somewhere. ==> i assume he meets karkat here? and stabs him. and karkats blood is revealed and then theyre friends ==> slick (now scurrilous straggler) is left on the green moon? exiled in rags ==> he builds a city ==> the felt's mansion is there also. they form gangs and become rivals ==> intermission starts; midnight crew infiltrates lord english's lair to get the vault prizes ==> slick goes in the vault and begins commanding karkat. if im wrong about any of this correct me im so curious

i really like clubs deuce and diamonds droog. i wish crowbar was in the intermission more. clover is just like nagito komaeda. trace and fin are insaaaane. i wish i knew more about the felt

ACT 4! GAME!!!!! game on lowas. its really cool i didnt get to play it my first readthrough. love the salamanders and love the captchalogue nonsense. it is so fun. thats all for today folks

[parateuthis]

20 credit hour semesters are not good for the speed of active progress on personal projects, but I've got that One Meta Thing I Have Yet to Name rotating in my mind for a bit, and I have Thoughts.

Anyways. It's weirdly hard to accurately get across what I mean when I talk about this thing, but I think the difference between canon and fanon Benrey HLVRAI really encapsulates it by virtue of being such a stark contrast. I'd be hard pressed to find a better example of how fandoms change characters to slot more cleanly into that common perception. Benrey's in such a unique position; he's an inhuman villain canonically "lusting over" the protagonist the whole time, he has a lot of interactions with other characters, a blank slate for a backstory, a lot of very memorable and dramatic moments. It would be difficult to deliberately create a character better fit to becoming the fandom's favorite. Also, by design he is completely fucking nonsensical and absurd. He is tied so, so tightly to Scorpy's sense of humor. iirc Holly talked during an interview for a podcast about how Benrey makes a more terrifying (and hilarious) villain because of that complete sense of like... you absolutely cannot understand him, you absolutely cannot reason with him, he is talking about how "SONY CEO JACK TRETTON HIRED... a Nintendo CEO Reggie and they built a big... BOMB" and he is going to kill you.

Everybody rewrites Benrey. I'd argue that you kind of HAVE TO, if you want to write anything remotely serious with a character like that. It's very commonly noticeable with the other characters too; HLVRAI has a story, but moment-to-moment, commitment to the bit and "what would be the funniest thing to say or do here" takes priority over developing a character that works in more serious contexts. (Side note and clarification, this isn't a criticism of HLVRAI, it's a lot of fun, it's just another way that the source material and fandom find themselves at serious odds, and if I had the time and energy I would be writing out another long post about the tone side of how fandom changes things.) Some characters hew more closely to canon characterization in fanfiction- Gordon as the straight man translates easily, and Dr. Coomer plays ball with tone shifts very well- and the author's own balance of interest in the source material vs the fandom plays a big role as well. But I have never, ever seen a Benrey I could mistake for the canonical Benrey. (Not that the canonical Benrey could really WORK in a text medium, imo. Live improv in GMod is his natural environment and specialized niche.)

Which brings me back to my own project, where the characters are the fanon versions of a nonexistent children's cartoon being eventually exposed to the nature of their reality. Fanon interpretations are obviously something I'm thinking a lot about as I'm developing characters, both in terms of general inspiration and as research for making them really click as something you would see scrolling through your dashboard. But as wonderful of an example Benrey is, that very same extreme absurdism makes him difficult as a model for the changes people make to make unique characters fit a mold, because that would imply a world where something like THIS

could be the main villain's speech from a children's cartoon.

actually that fucking rules